Thursday, September 11, 2008

Random Thankfulness

Iris at Stings My Heart hosts Thankful Thursday.
It was interesting she mentioned today that many of the bloggers that write each Thursday about their thankfulness sometimes find it hard to get started because of circumstances that they are dealing with. Then once they begin writing that God just opens their heart and mind and the thankfulness just flows.
I pray that today that is what happens with me.

I am struggling really hard in the faith and trusting area. Daily I have to trust that God is in control of all the circumstances in my life and ministry.

Daily I struggle with escaping fear and anxiety over the financial issues. We used to have a commercial building and our ministry was much larger than it is now. We struggled then financially and one of my prayers was that God would provide and that we wouldn't have to struggle so much.

I have heard often times people say be careful what you pray for. In that instance I know God was in control because he took that burden away from us. We no longer do our ministry in a building and so that financial burden is lifted at least for now.

But the personal burden and the burden to raise funds to reopen are overwhelming.
When we see the need it is frustrating.

I am thankful though that at this point the ministry is such that I can help our daughter and son in love by taking care of the baby. I keep him two days week right now.

If God hadn't closed that door I would be involved 70-80 a weeks in ministry. Which btw was taking it's toal on my and Cowboy. He forced us to step back re-evaluate and to get control. That is part of the purpose of my blog.
My Journey Back is a journey toward finding myself again and to personally finding God and praising him and thanking him for what he has provided.

For the last 2 years he provided us with a home "rent free". We lived on 10 acres and we had a 3 bedroom house with a pool. It was such a Blessing. Who would have known when we moved there (before the mission began) that we would have a landlady that is a Christian. When we began to be slow paying she said don't worry. When we began to not pay she found a way for us to work for her (managing two other rental properties). We stayed there until June when they decided to develop the property.
God Blessed us we know.

Now we are in a house on acreage again. He answered all our prayers. It is minutes from our daughters and is just the prettiest little house. Little fence around the house and lots of potential for flower beds. It is just beautiful. You have to see the whole picture here. For five years we have been in full-time ministry supported by donations. We can't show a reall income. We have never taken a salary only what we needed for gas, utilities etc. So we couldn't show income to a potential landlord. We are convinced God brought us to this place. That he worked out all the circumstances for us.

And so I must trust that he is in control. And I must be thankful that he is and be thankful that he will provide provision.

God provides sometimes not exactly in our timing. Sometimes not exactly as we think it should be but he provides.

I am thankful God is in our day to day business. I am thankful he doesn't give up on me when I lack faith.

I am thankful he helps me put into words my feelings and that when I ask he is faithful to provide.

What are you thankful for today?
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